I read way too many Archie comics when I was a kid. And I have a photographic memory. And I have one of those minds that constantly get stuck playing a soundbite over and over again. Not just songs. Snippets of poetry. Scripture passages, usually half-verses or just a line from a verse. Comic strips. I get whole comic strips playing in my head sometimes. I’ll have to dig up the one about the lucky star for you sometime. Never say I don’t do things for you!

Anyway, in the Archie comics, Ronnie’s relationship with her father intrigued me to no end. And so I paid particular attention to the things he said to her. And when Ronnie shopped (and she shopped a lot), and Mr. Lodge got the bill, he would always do the big cringe and EGADS! would appear in the big bubble over his head. It stuck with me because one, what did egads mean and why did I never hear anyone else say it? And two, how did Ronnie not get the snot beat out of her on a regular basis? Like I said, very intriguing.

The reason for this whole long ramble is simply that I’ve been doing a lot of shopping. I mean, more shopping in the last four weeks than I have done in… well, ever, actually! Our house is actually furnished except for a couch. We currently have a mere excuse for a couch. I want a REAL couch. Furnished! I have new CDs and books and even some new clothes. We have a new seventeen-year-old car.

And then last week, it dawned on me that I don’t necessarily wait for Ishi to get home from his excruciatingly long days or have a day off to do this magical new thing called shopping! Because PEOPLE. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH STUFF YOU CAN BUY ON TEH INTERTUBES.

I did not know. Or rather, I knew, in the way you know there are Lamborghinis and $950 bottles of champagne in the world. Sure, they may be out there somewhere, but nowhere we’d ever be! So, yeah, I’ve been shopping online. I figure in about four to six weeks, it’s going to be Christmas in March around here!

And every time I click on the little “Check out now” button, I cringe and someone shouts “EGADS!” in my head.

1. Obama tattoos. What do you think of people who got one? Well, I don’t know what I think about the people, but I know the idea of a tattoo for a president freaks me out. I wanted a tattoo when I was younger but couldn’t think of a single thing I could commit to seeing for the rest of my life! As for the Obama tattoos, can you imagine having that much faith that something would work out?! He could be a hero, or he could be the worst diasaster the world has ever had to deal with. We just don’t know. And I can’t imagine having so much faith in anything of this world that I would make a permanent mark on myself to celebrate it! That actually kind of makes me sad, come to think of it.

2. How many blogs do you read a day, and do you always comment? Oh my goodness. My mother reads this blog and I’m already in trouble for how behind I am on my research papers! I’m not about to incriminate myself with this one, no sirree. If I read a blog though, I almost always comment, except for those on which I lurk because I feel too shy to speak to their authors.

3. Do you know to swim? If I were thrown off a boat, I would be able to keep myself alive until help came, within reason. I might even be able to direct myself towards land or another boat, again within reason.

4. Describe your favorite shirt. Thank you. I now have Garnet Rogers’ “This Shirt” playing in my head. OK, let’s see. It’s white, kind of a babydoll cut with a satiny cotton knit rib top part and the rest is plain white cotton. It’s roomy and soft and makes me feel incredibly fresh and summery as well as sweet and romantic. It’s a very talented shirt.

5. What is one thing that is ALWAYS on your grocery list? Extra points for imagination and creativity. If something is always on your grocery list, how imaginative or creative can it be? For us it would have to be pregnancy tests. We only need a list when we do our monthly ‘big shop’.

6. Have you ever done any acting? Yes. I do Oscar-worthy performances every single day when Ishi tells me about something in the news I simply could not care less about if it were my full time job. Other than that, no. I wasn’t even in a high school play! Talk about wasted talent.

7. I just made a delicious smelling dinner with mystery meat. Will you have some? Oh, I would, but I just this second became a fruitarian. Thanks for the offer though!

8. If you are driving in the rain and you see a person walking along the road, do you intentionally try to splash them? I really worry about the world, you know? No, for heaven’s sake, I do not try to splash them, and to be completely truthful, if Ishi is driving, he usually stops to ask if they need help or a ride!

9. Yearbooks- do you still have any from school? I think I have one from junior high… somewhere… oh, and I have last year’s university yearbook. Ishi has all of his. ALL OF THEM.

10. What kind of shampoo do you use? There are literally four different kinds of shampoo in my shower right now. I get so bored I can’t even use the same shampoo two times in a row! Neutrogena, Aussie Sun Kissed, Sunsilk, and John Frieda. I can’t believe I’m writing about shampoo. Low point.

11. And just to counter Ber’s first question from last week…. What’s the hottest temps you have experienced? Give me a moment to recover from the appalling grammar of that last question. OK. What is the hottest temperature I have ever experienced? That would be 48°C, which is 118°F. Teaching English in the Middle East. Astonishingly hot. It literally burnt your nose when you breathed in. I remember licking my lips and being shocked at how my tongue felt cold on my lips! I have also experienced -41°C in Calgary, AB. Most times I would rather be too hot than too cold. Of course, at the moment I’m too cold, so that might be skewing my opinion.

You now know some pretty useless things about me. I’m sorry. I will do better tomorrow. ^_~

Most of you know how enamoured I am of LOLcats. In particular, though, what tickles my funnybone of funnybones, is the FAIL concept. Generally, the photo is of something being attempted, oh, say, like the jumping jacks in the video below, and being failed. Usually spectacularly.

You can imagine how my little heart burst forth in song when I came across this… FAILblog. I may be the happiest I have been in weeks, to be honest.

I am dying to know where this was shot, and under what circumstances. How can grown men not know how to do jumping jacks? One thing is for sure. I feel soooo much better about my own physical abilities now!